Assalamualaikum wbt

Do you believe in reincarnation? I don’t but I had experienced once.

May 1st 1993 left a vast impact in my life. I was 50% burned, left in ICU for one night and got up in the morning knowing that I have scarlet-black scary wounding skin from top to waist.

I kept myself away from the public for two months. I didn’t go to school. I refrained myself from mixing around with my siblings. I had a severe inferiority complex back then.

After two months surviving my black days at home, I managed to gain confidence again. I told my father that I wanted to attend classes back. The first day I resumed schooling was the fisrt day of the mid term exam. 1993 – I was just in standard 2.

I have lost so many things; confidence, beauty, communication skill. I was very introvert. Everyone kept comparing me with my sister and cousins. Provided that we were in a family function and they all attended it. What made it worst was when it came to digging differences between me and my sister. Obviously she wins over me. She has everything that I don’t. However, Allah rewarded me with so many good things in return. I’ve got 100% in 9 out of 11 subjects in that particular exam, attention, love and everything one needs from family and friends. Ever since then, my priority was only on my study, nothing else that I bother.

I should never stop thanking Allah for the second chance He has given me. I should thank my mother and father for taking a great care and giving their best to see me recovering and also to the ‘petua kulit pisang’ I’ve been applying and experimenting with and the result was unexpectedly miraculous! I am back kicking without a single scar left on the skin. And thanks to everyone who has made me felt useless with zombi-ugly look. Because of the thoughts, I am what I am now.

Ya Allah, bless my parents and family, teachers and relatives, friends and colleagues. They deserve to be rewarded with mercy and love, kindness and calmness, and beautiful life here and hereafter. Amin.

Last but not least, happy 16th birthday Sarah! Yeah. You are just 16!

Note 1: Half a loaf is better than none. I’m grateful for what I have now. Alhamdulillah. 🙂

Note 2: This 16 year-old little girl is down with fever. 😥

Note 3: Aik aik aik. No one noticed I miscounted the year/age? Huahuahua. 1993 – 2009 = 16 years. Yes. 16 years ago, I was reborn as a new me after the incident took place.

Assalamualaikum wbt

Rou Theng and Rui Wen came to my room. They wanted to collect some photos during the games in Volgograd. I don’t have much of them but I own a very special photo of Rui Wen with someone. No matter how, she must come here to get it. It was very pleasant to sit together and talk about recent activities that took place in our lives. Both of them are my juniors, in the same batch with my housemates. Rou Theng is my teammate while Rui Wen is Pena’s teammate in basketball.

We never been this closed before this. But getting to know them more, I admit that we have good chemistry. The two girls, Pena, Fatt, Wanie and I sat together eating our special cupcakes and kebab, and we did gossiping this and that catching up some stories that we left behind in Volgograd.

Well, they made my day. They really did. I am not feeling well at the moment. I have running nose and spinning head. I wonder, does swine flu start descending to Eastern Europe? Oh no way. Russia has a special method and it’s own antidote againts this virus. May it work well to protect us all.

One thing I enjoy doing with the girls: stalking! Oh my goodness! They are very good at stalking people, googling names and details about people they admire. But the most important thing I will never forget about them is, they helped me to get connected with someone I have crush on. Hahaha. Ops. Cut the story off. Don’t ask me any further. Crush is just crush. Nothing’s going to change after this. Hahaha.

Note: I don’t know what else to do to kill my time. Books have killed me enough. And now I need some escapades. 🙄

Assalamualaikum wbt

My mother and father went for a blood screening test at Dr. Rama’s clinic in the town. When they were there, Dr. Rama addressed my father as ‘Young Man’ despite of his almost-golden age.

When they came back home, my father started calling my mother as ‘Young Girl’ because of her normal blood pressure despite of her current age. I laughed crazily when they told me the story.

Oh. So sweet of them!

Note: Ayah reminded me this fact: “Now it’s May. Next is June. Only one month plus left for you to survive.” Oh. He’s so sweet. He always does the countdown for me. Muaah!

Assalamualaikum wbt

Exam sudahpun selesai. Alhamdulillah, markah yang cemerlang. Sekejap saja viva pagi tadi. Yang lebih menguntungkan, semua soalan saya berkaitan Cardiology. Bidang yang paling saya suka. Saya ingatkan, kemungkinan besar saya akan kena tanya banyak soalan-soalan berkaitan Pulmonology. Tapi satu pun tiada saolan berkaitan paru-paru. Huhu.

Yang penting, satu group saya semuanya sudah lepas bahagian ini. Ada beberapa orang lagi juga mendapat markah cemerlang. Sekarang ini, hanya tinggal empat posting pendek (seminggu lebih setiap satu) yang akan kami lalui sebelum kelas tamat secara rasmi pada 1 Jun nanti. Selepas itu, barulah bahagian paling penting untuk State Exam akan bermula. Makin cuak rasanya.

Ok. Abaikan kecuakan sekejap.

Dua jam daripada sekarang, kontinjen universiti saya akan bertolak menuju ke Volgograd. Volgogames akan bermula pada hari esok. Perjalanan ke sana mengambil masa paling kurang 16 jam menaiki bas dari Moscow. Ada 3 buah bas dari sini. Haa. Silalah bayangkan bagaimana keadaannya. Saya pernah balik Malaysia termasuk transit pun hanya mengambil masa 14 jam. Ini sampai 16 jam tu! Huhu.

Saya, Wanie dan Pena baru saja siap memasak bekal makanan untuk dibawa di atas bas. Semoga untuk sukan kali ini, tiada lagi insiden diarrhea secara berjemaah dalam perjalanan balik nanti. Kenangan tahun 2005 dulu masih belum saya lupakan. 😆

Dan saya yakin, saya akan tidur mati di atas bas nanti. Sesungguhnya, saya sangat tidak cukup tidur dalam tempoh seminggu ini.

Nota 1: Yeay! Saya akan bertemu dengan Dyana Nizar, dormmate dan classmate saya di KISAS dulu. Dia menuntut di Volgograd. Dah lama tak berjumpa dengannya.

Nota 2: Insya Allah akan ada gambar-gambar menarik sepanjang berkampung di Volgograd nanti. Pernah lihat Statue of Liberty versi Rusia? Ada sebuah di Volgograd. Jauh lebih besar. Nantikan ya!

Nota 3: Tak penting pun nota ni. Cuma nak kata, saya akan merentas ladang gandum di sepanjang perjalanan nanti. Auw. Saya suka!

Assalamualaikum wbt

Barangkali ini lumrahnya orang berjauhan. Tidak rindu, tidak sah. Bila rindu, air mata jadi murah. Senyum jadi payah. Suara jadi mahal. Hati jadi sebal. Jiwa jadi separuh. Jasad jadi luruh.

Bila terlalu rindukan keluarga, apa yang dimarah oleh ayah dulu-dulu pun saya jadi rindu. Emak membebel itu ini pun saya jadi rindu. Inikan pula ketika bersama-sama mereka membuat aktiviti bersama-sama. Mencuci kereta bersama-sama pun saya jadi rindu. Apatah lagi jika teringat bersalaman dengan mereka. Terus jadi rindu serindu-rindunya.

Dengan Kaklong pula, teringat semula kami bertekak kecil-kecil dulu pun saya rindu. Inikan pula saat-saat berkongsi hidup tanpa rahsia antara kami berdua. Dengan Nan, saya rindu dia memberi nasihat pendek. Sampaikan, apa yang kami jerit-jeritkan waktu bergaduh dulu-dulu pun saya jadi rindu. Lan lagilah saya rindu. Sudah lama tak mendengar beritanya. Bila saya rindu, segala apa yang digaduhkan semuanya buat saya semakin rindukan dia. Mungkin dalam ramai-ramai di rumah, saya paling rindukan dia. Sebab jika teringat dia, air mata saya boleh tumpah tiada sukatannya.

Dengan Adi, saya rindu dia membuat jenaka. Saya rindu semua cerita peliknya. Sampaikan, saya boleh terbayang-bayang mukanya menyerengih setelah berjaya membuat lawak bersahaja. Saya rindu usikannya. Saya juga rindukan ketenangan Adam. Saya rindu suara yang diam itu. Saya rindu untuk mendengar dia menyanyi bila bersendirian. Saya rindu untuk melihat wajah Adam yang tenang.

Saya rindu Azizi dan Aiman. Dalam setiap detik saya bersendirian hari ini, saya terbayang-bayang Azizi dan Aiman tersenyum riang. Azizi tersenyum dengan pipinya yang bulat. Aiman tersenyum dengan giginya yang jelas dapat dilihat. Saya rindu senyuman dua budak kecil itu.

Saya tidak tipu. Bila rindu, air mata jadi sangat murah. Dan hati jadi sangat goyah. Mungkin, rindu inilah kekuatan yang akan menemani saya untuk exam siang nanti.

Nota: Bila rindu, saya akan rasa pedih dalam tekak. Perasaan itu tak dapat digambarkan. Tapi rasa perit dalam tekak itu menyebabkan: Saya tak boleh bercakap banyak. Saya selalu kebil mata untuk menahan rasa pedih itu. Dan kalau saya cuba bercakap juga, cuba melawan kebilan mata juga, saya boleh menangis. Kesimpulannya, rindu itu untuk dihayati. Bukan untuk ditentangi.